I know its time to update this space, I thought hard if i should just say:
"This space will not be updated until the tide changes, until the world spins again"
But time and tide waits for no man, I've been in my 'winter' far too long that my dry bones hurts.. Its time to get up from the cold hard floor and pick up the pieces of my life, of my heart, time to make a connection with the one who loves me regardless, that is my Jesus, my Lord.
Alex and I have walked miles and miles together, but for now we just need to slow down, meanwhile find ourselves in God again. T'was a hard decision any of us could make, probably an unlikely couple that you'll see walking down this path. We'll be on a one month breather, friends asked what can they do to help me, all I asked is our mutual friends can just say a little prayer for us, cos' there's nothing else men can do but to wait on the Lord.
My heart fought so hard to change that facebook statues, it was thumping mad loudly that my surrounding sound faded to only focusing on my heart beating. Pulled through the rest of the 5 hours at work after the news was broke out to me by running to the toilet occasionally to cry out those pain. Headed home, sat down on my couch crying out to God. Was tough, but I don't know what to do if there wasn't God in my life.
Got reminded of Job, his entire life was robbed away but yet he choose to praise God. (In all this Job did not sin nor charge God with wrong. Job 1:22)
In 2010, I decided that I'll be going to SOT'11.
In that very same year:
I lost a close friendship, not that the three of us are not talking anymore, things weren't the same. But I'm thanking God for bring us closer again recently.
My family started going through a rough patch, my parents are separated, things are still not looking too well, a divorce is on its way..Things just got worse last night too and its turning ugly.
The entire year I felt stagnant in my walk with God, in my ministry, I was constantly disappointed and demoralized.
And now, my relationship has took a toil as well.
But in HIM, i place my trust.
I won't understand why or what He is doing, but all I can do is wait and trust that He has a reason and a plan for all this.
Knelled down in my prayer closet last night to worship and a song came to me,
You are the peace that guards my heart,
My help in times of need.
You are the hope that leads me on,
And brings me to my knees.
For there I find You waiting,
For there I'll find release.
So with all my heart I'll worship,
And unto You i'll sing
For You alone deserve all glory
For You alone deserve all praise
Father we worship and adore You
Father we long to see Your face.
A peace that surpasses all understanding covered me.
I pray, you'll have the peace with you too, I pray you'll be fine, I pray that through this period of time you'll stay strong. If God is for us, who can be against us?
God, once again I commit my life and all persecutions into your hands, keep us safe, heal our hearts, take away all the hurt and bitterness. Restore to us the joy we have in You, restore our broken hearts, fill us with Your love. We love You.
went back to take a look at lovesacollaboration , a blog I started out for us, the same struggles we had in the beginning of last year.. I pray we'll get through it all again.